The definition of feisty is as follows: #1. Having or showing exuberance and strong determination. #2. Touchy and aggressive. The way I look at it, the two definitions are somewhat contradictory.
I think anyone who knows me will tell you that I'm all of the above. I've lost jobs, girlfriends, wives, and family members due to the above "qualities." Maybe because I'm a Scorpio? I don't know, I'm not real big into that shit, though that's what people who are tell me. I'm definitely feisty though, that's certainly not a question.
When I'm at my best, (definition #1), people love to be around me. I excel in all things. I climb the corporate ladder like a fucking spider monkey, wherever I am. I'm the boss. I'm the commissioner of our fantasy football league. I'm the organizer of group trips or concert outings. I take on responsibilities that I have no business taking on, and somehow pull them off. I'm outgoing. I am a "quotable friend" as someone put it. I coin phrases that make sense to only a few people. I strive to be the best at everything that I do, and usually I am. I'm smart, athletic, confident, witty, charming, charismatic, and family oriented. I'm a great boyfriend or husband. I'm the best father I know. I obviously love myself!
When I'm at my worst, which isn't very often, (definition #2), I alienate my friends. I get fired from jobs. I sit in my apartment and delegate tasks to others even though I could clearly take care of them myself. I get my balls busted for being a "bitch," even by those closest to me. I'm introverted. I'm anxious. I say stupid shit. I do stupid things. I'm lazy, mean, rude and not a very good son or brother. I break up with girls who mean nothing to me, most of the time for no reason, though sometimes justifiably. I get divorced, (twice.) I miss my daughter's softball game. I can't stand myself.
I'd like to think that as I get older and wiser that I'm much more #1 then #2. I can still be touchy and aggressive at times, but my life experiences have tamed me exponentially. Becoming a father to my kids, as I've posted before, is a big reason, but I've gotten into that enough. Another big reason for becoming more exuberant and determined are those "lightning strike" moments in your life. These are few and far between, unfortunately, especially for a feisty soul such as myself. These moments make people incredibly hopeful for the future, as opposed to pessimistic and touchy and aggressive.
When they happen, those things that give you butterflies in your gut, (not the kind from getting punched in the nuts; see previous post). I'm talking about that huge job offer that you get. I'm talking about that huge bass that you land. I'm talking about your kid learning how to talk and learning how to hug you or make his first baseball team or just generally make you proud. I'm talking about the girl or guy that you meet, after so much bullshit and so many false, faulty relationships. The person that when you look at your phone and see their name, hear their voice, see their smile...your heart races, those butterflies show up, you smile and you know that you caught something great. Lightning in a bottle.
You can't force these things to happen. Usually they do when least expected. I sure as shit know that if you're a feisty one like myself, you have a much better chance of catching the lightning when you're acting like a feisty go-getter rather than a feisty asshole. A little bit of Irish luck doesn't hurt either.
Make it a point to think positively and be opportunistic. Let the butterflies in when you get that big job, go to your boy's first little league game, see your daughter all dressed up for her prom, meet that person that makes and keeps you happy.
Leave your bottle closed, be a "bitch," feel sorry for yourself, and you'll never be happy. Keep your bottle open, and you'll catch that lightning. It's the best feeling in the world. If you do the right thing with it, you'll find that lightning to be the best part of your life, whatever it may be.
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