People like to say, "I wish I knew then what I know now." I'm calling bullshit on that one. If I knew "then" what I know now, I would have been a miserable prick for my entire life, (instead of just a miserable prick now.) I remember back in grade school and middle school when there was no pressure to make money, put food on the table, keep a roof over my head, stress about work, stress about family, stress about anything. The only thing I had to worry about was what kind of fun me and the neighborhood kids were going to have after school and in the summers, keeping the tires on my bike from going flat, doing well in baseball, football and occasionally school, and trying not to beat the shit out of my little brother.
High school comes along, and a little stress gets added, but also a whole new bag of fun, (I'm looking in your direction drugs and alcohol.) Making life-long friends, chasing girls, learning to drive, skipping school, and STILL having tons of time to hang out with your buddies. You might get a job and worry a little bit about what college you might want to attend or what you want to do after high school, but you still don't have to pay rent. Your parents might teach you some responsibility about money, but for the most part, you're happy if you have $60 bucks in your pocket to put some gas in your car and cause trouble or go to Burger King. You bitch about having to go to school for 6 hours a day and when you're a senior you can't wait for high school to be over.
During your college years, there is much added pressure, but let's face it, your late teens and early 20's were pretty fucking fun, no? College parties, trips to Cancun, hanging out with your friends...still. Maybe you have a serious relationship with a girl who doesn't cheat on you and isn't a completely crazy bitch. ( I know this is a far-fetched scenario since 99% of the 3.5 billion women on Earth are completely psychotic, but that's an entry for a different day.) Maybe you have a boyfriend who doesn't cheat on you and gives a shit about your "feelings." (Again, not likely.) The point is, chances are you're having a relatively decent time and your parents, if you're lucky, are helping you out with money and decision making and so forth.
If you're REALLY lucky, by the time you're done with college, or even if didn't go and you get around to your mid-twenties, you have some semblance of a good job, or a good, realistic plan for your future. You move into an apartment or buy a condo, and the stress starts piling on. You have a little less time for your friends, you have bills to pay, you have loans to pay off, you have to start getting up early. For most people, these are all manageable and there's still time for fun. Maybe you take up golf or fishing or snowboarding. Perhaps you go on some cool vacations and are able to leave your worries behind.
Eventually, you find yourself in a serious relationship. Some people get married. Some are lucky enough to get a good deal on a new house. Hopefully you have a good job or a budding career. More stress, more bills, even less time with your friends.
Some people fall on hard times. They lose their job or their significant other. Grandparents start to pass away. Some friends might get married or move to another part of the country. Things really start to change, sometimes not for the better.
I can't speak to anything much further than the above paragraphs. Hopefully I'll be able to check back in another 30 years with some additional insight. I know today that I wouldn't have had any fun growing up as a kid and living it up in my 20's if I knew "then" the things I know now...so I guess that makes me one of the few who is glad that I didn't know. It's fun looking back to those times when there was no pressure, and every single day of my life made me who I am today, and I'm obviously awesome.
No matter what course you travel in life, and how things turn out for you, good or bad, there's one thing that I know without question, 100%, no doubt about it. If you are lucky enough to have a kid, you get to live those years all over again. Not literally, of course, but you get the privilege of watching them grow up and the joy of shaping their lives and giving advice and seeing the innocent, pressure free existence in them that you wish you could grab onto just one more time, maybe for one more day.
Vinny Jr. turned two years old today. People warn you about how time goes by so fast that you have to really enjoy each day with your kids and sit back and take it all in. I can tell you that truer words have never been spoken and I've never been given better advice.
ALL THE BULLSHIT in life, all the hard times, all the money problems, death, divorce, work. Nothing else in life matters. Only your child. Everything that is done in my life, is now done for my son. NOTHING ELSE IN LIFE MATTERS. Once I saw my son pop out of his mother, (really fucked up and amazing by the way, I suggest you check it out if you get the chance), heard him cry, held his hand, looked into his eyes. Everything went away....and it was only him. Happy 2nd birthday to my world, my reason for living, my son. The best part of me....is you.
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